By Ed Welch
Daily struggles are expected in the Christian life. We encounter temptations, we get stuck in sin, grief abounds, and we are always confronted with difficult decisions that require wisdom. We are, indeed, people who need daily help for our souls.
Pastors, of course, were never intended to carry the burden of pastoral care by themselves. Before Christ, priests and prophets were the go-to counselors, but now the task is dispersed among all God’s people. Pastors are called “to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ” (Ephesians 4:12, ESV). Most prominent among this ministry and building up is the way we care for one another’s souls.
God’s Word gives insight into the nature and care of the soul we could never have apart from His revelation. Our approach should capture both the tone and content of the great themes of Scripture. Everything we say should sound better than what anyone could imagine. Our care for each other should go deep yet be elegantly simple.
So, how can we build a culture of care in our churches?
Acknowledge our own neediness. The best preparation for helping others is to be helped. As we follow Jesus, the church culture aspires to humility, and the most practical way for us to express that is to know our own neediness and ask for help.
Nothing could be clearer. We are created, finite, limited in our abilities, sinners, and sufferers. We need the Lord, and we need one another, every day. This is so fundamental to life with Christ that we could define faith as, “I need Jesus.” But it’s harder than it seems.
Our corporate goal then is to express Psalm-like neediness to the Lord, and, with that, to ask someone to pray for us. Perhaps we need help with a difficult relationship, power to battle temptation, or to love children with wisdom. That is impossible apart from the Spirit’s work of humility. But imagine a church in which members ask someone for prayer, every day. That alone could change our church culture.
Love wisely. Equipped with the Spirit and humility, we realize others also need us. God has been pleased to use the ordinary care of ordinary people to bring extraordinary growth and change in our lives (1 Corinthians 1:20-2:10). So we participate by taking the initiative and moving with love toward brothers, sisters, and neighbors.
Once there, we simply ask: How are you? What could be simpler, yet so important? We will hear about events from the week; we are especially eager to hear how those events affected the person. We listen for joys or sorrows. With the joys, we rejoice and enjoy them together. With the sorrows, we pray. We try to match life with Scripture and consider together what God says to us, and we pray.
Imagine that kind of lively interdependence happening after a church service or in a small group. Imagine people moving toward each other, with a special interest in the visitor, the marginalized, the isolated. Imagine people smiling, enjoying one another, being grieved together and praying then and there.
Once we pray for someone, that person is lodged into our hearts. We can’t help but follow up in a day or a week and ask what God is doing. Not many have experienced that kind of love and care. When we receive it, we are inspired to go even deeper in sharing our hearts, and we are inspired to move into the lives of others.
It is through these small steps of neediness and love, by ordinary people, our churches become an attractive light to the world.
ED WELCH is the author of Side by Side: Walking With Others in Wisdom and Love.
