by Adam Weber
I grew up in a home filled with music. My mom started playing piano when she was three years old and played weekly in church starting in seventh grade.
My favorite song to sing with her was “Here I Am, Lord”:
Who will bear My light to them?…
I will go Lord, if You lead me.
I didn’t understand the words I was singing. But early on, this song was planted within me. It was a song I would cross paths with again.
***
One of my greatest struggles in life has been and continues to be the feeling of being completely inadequate. Even in my adult years, I have felt disqualified from being used to do anything important, particularly by God.
When you feel ordinary, average, or less skilled, it’s always easier to play things safe, isn’t it? To blend in. Don’t raise your hand. Don’t step out. Take no chances. Don’t try to be used by God.
In the Bible, we see all kinds of ordinary people being used by God. Abraham was too old. Moses stuttered. You’ve heard the stories. Their stories are powerful accounts of God using average people for great things. But I still struggled to connect with them. Yes, they appeared to be quite average, but how average could they be if they’re mentioned in the Bible? I know I’m not mentioned in the Bible.
***
Some years passed by, and on a visit home from college, my mom pulled out the hymnal and we sang “Here I Am, Lord” again.
Who will bear My light to them? Whom shall I send?
This time around, the words took on a completely different meaning. I thought of how God had brought light into my darkness, how knowing Jesus had changed everything about me.
Whom shall I send?
My answer: Someone else.
Sitting on that piano bench, a tug-of-war took place within me. I longed to tell the whole world what God had done in my life. But I figured it was probably best for me to stay out of the way so a more qualified person could do so.
As we sang on, however, I heard my soul speak the words:
I will go Lord, if You lead me.
Over the following weeks and months, I kept hearing myself quietly speak the words, “Here I am, Lord.” If you lead, I’ll follow. Then it’s on you, right?
***
A few more years would pass before I sang “Here I Am, Lord” again. The next time was in Bismarck, North Dakota. I had finished seminary and was being ordained. At the very end of the ordination service, of all songs, we sang:
Who will bear My light to them?…
I will go Lord, if You lead me.
I was overwhelmed by God’s faithfulness. For years he had been speaking to me. Preparing me. Directing me. He wanted to use me.
The truth is that, on our own, we are in inadequate. In every way. On our own, we are disqualified from being used by God.
Thankfully, it’s not about who we are. It’s only about who God is. It’s about his gifts. His abilities. His strength. His wisdom. And his potential. Not ours.
Oddly enough, the only time we can’t be used by God is when we think we are adequate.
***
Looking back, I’ve never been adequate. It’s been God the whole time. If you need proof that God can use you, look no further. I’m your guy.
Feel inadequate? Lacking? Insufficient? Disqualified to be used?
We’re right where we need to be in order to be used by God. All we have to do is say yes.
When we start saying yes to him, he’ll begin to do the impossible in and through us. Things that blow us away. Things that we could never ever imagine. Things that will leave us completely speechless.
When we’re willing to say yes to the small things, he’ll give us opportunities to say yes to big things. This is the story of my life.
Adam, will you follow me?
Yes.
Share your story at a church service as a junior in high school?
Yes.
Go to seminary even though you have a business degree?
Yes.
Start a church even though you think it’s crazy?
Yes.
Launch a second campus. And then a third, fourth, and fifth?
Yes.
Even though you’re not a writer and you have zero qualifications to write a book, write one?
Ummm… Yes, Lord.
The best part is that when God does the impossible through average people, we know it’s all God. It’s because of his abilities and not ours. Only he gets the credit. Only he gets the glory.
“Who will bear My light to them?” Jesus still asks.
Our simple prayer:
Here I am, Lord.
Adam Weber is founder and lead pastor of Embrace, a church that has six campuses in two states. Adam, his wife Becky, and their kids live in Sioux Falls, South Dakota with their four chickens and dog, Daisy. Adam is the author of Talking with God: What to Say When You Don’t Know How to Pray.
The featured image pictures Jerome “Curly” Howard, Larry Fine, and Moe Howard (the Three Stooges) out of costume.