For some, the life changes they experience impact their church attendance habits. What is the church’s role in these member’s lives?
By Marissa Postell Sullivan
If you’re like many pastors, at least once in the past few years you looked out over your pews and considered the missing faces—those who used to attend your church but are no longer there. Some consciously decided to leave your church, but how many simply slipped out of the habit of attending?
If there’s anything we can be certain about in life, it’s that life changes. And changes that happen in one area of a person’s life inevitably impact other areas of their life. For some, these life changes impact their church attendance habits.
People leave churches for various reasons. Lifeway Research found most churchgoers who leave one church to find another leave because of a residential move (60%). But some leave one church and head to another in the same community (40%). Knowing why churchgoers may be leaving their church and what they’re looking for in a new congregation will help pastors know how to better serve those in their pews.
Of the churchgoers who left a church for a reason other than a residential move, most say they changed churches because of changes at the church (29%) or because the church was not fulfilling their needs or reasons for attending (29%). But 1 in 4 simply became disenchanted with the pastor (27%) or church (26%). Others left a congregation because they couldn’t agree with some of its teachings or positions on issues or politics (22%) or because they felt out of place there (20%). But nearly 1 in 5 (18%) say they left their previous church because of changes in their life situation.
Life changes
Among the 18% who say life changes pulled them away from their previous church, 26% say family or home responsibilities prevented them from attending, and 24% point to a work situation keeping them away. Relationship issues played a role for some, including 19% who divorced, separated, or were widowed, 17% who were taking or going with someone else who no longer attended, and 11% who got married. Another 15% say illness or infirmity kept them away. Around 1 in 10 say they simply got too busy to attend (11%), they just wanted a break from church (11%), or their children’s activities were on Sundays (8%).
Churchgoers ages 30-49 are among the most likely to say changes in their life situation caused them to stop attending their previous church (24%). And churchgoers who attend the least frequently—twice a month—are the most likely to say they stopped attending their previous church because of changes in their life situation (26%).
Different life changes cause different responses in a person’s life. For some, the changes they experienced in their life situations necessitated that they stop attending their previous church. But for others, the changes they experienced simply disrupted their routine, leading them to stop attending their previous church. And when they returned to church, they began attending a different church. It is the church’s role to walk with its members through their various seasons of change, helping them stay connected to the body of Christ throughout the transition regardless of whether they must stop attending church for a time.
Working on Sundays
Nearly 1 in 4 (24%) churchgoers who say life changes pulled them away from their previous church point to a work situation that prevented them from going to church. A 2021 study from Lifeway Research found almost a quarter of Protestant churchgoers (23%) are at least occasionally forced to miss Sunday morning services because of their jobs, including 5% who have to work that time each week, 6% twice a month or more, 4% once a month, 5% a few times a year, and 2% once a year or less. For those who must regularly miss Sunday morning worship for work, it doesn’t take much to get out of the habit of going to church at all.
The new church dropout
Although the number is not large, churches should pay particular attention to the churchgoers who say they simply got too busy to attend. Another Lifeway Research study found 71% of churchgoing teenagers who stopped attending church for at least a year as young adults say their leaving wasn’t an intentional decision. It just happened during life transitions after high school.
71% of churchgoing teenagers who stopped attending church for at least a year as young adults say their leaving wasn’t an intentional decision. It just happened during life transitions after high school. Share on XAnalysis from Lifeway Research highlighted a similar trend among churchgoers after COVID-19. In February 2021, 91% of churchgoers said they planned on attending in-person services as much or more than they did prior to the pandemic once things became safe. But in 2022, many previous churchgoers still had not returned, missing as many as 1 in 4 attendees. Some churchgoers themselves admit they’re no longer attending as often as they did prior to the pandemic.
Like young adults getting out of the habit of church attendance during college, many churchgoers fell out of the practice of regular church attendance during the pandemic, filling their Sundays with something else.
Competing with travel sports
Other churchgoers specifically point to their children’s activities happening on Sundays as the life change that caused them to stop attending their previous church. A Lifeway Research study of both U.S. Protestant pastors and churchgoers found most in both groups believe it’s OK to miss church occasionally for a kid’s game or travel sporting event, but those in the pews are laxer on the issue than those behind the pulpit.
The study found fewer than 1 in 5 U.S. Protestant churchgoers (18%) say it is never OK to skip church for kid’s sports. Around 3 in 4 (74%) believe it’s acceptable at least occasionally, including 22% who say once or twice a year, 39% a few times a year, and 13% many times a year.
The church’s role
As pastors and church leaders learn of the 18% of churchgoers who leave their churches because of changes in their life situation, they must consider the church’s role in these member’s lives. The churchgoers who leave their church because of life changes likely have the same theological beliefs and same feelings toward the church that they had before. The church doesn’t need to call these former churchgoers back to the faith but simply back to the church.
Addressing this issue begins with discipleship. With the inevitability of life changes, the church must begin discipling churchgoers to love the local church long before they experience significant life change themselves. Then when their life circumstances change, they run to the church for support rather than away from the church in hopes of shedding some responsibility and saving some time. When a person loves the local church and understands their role in the body of Christ, they are more likely to make the effort to stay connected to the church in the midst of major transitions in their lives.
“With the inevitability of life changes, the church must begin discipling churchgoers to love the local church long before they experience significant life change themselves.” — @marissapostell Share on XThe church should also be prepared to walk with church members through the changes they experience in their life circumstances—from changing family or home responsibilities or work situations to relational issues, sickness, or other things competing for their time. Is your church prepared to offer its members the support they need—physical, mental, spiritual—to stay connected to the church as they navigate these changes?
For permission to republish this article, contact Marissa Postell Sullivan.
