How to Protect Your Schedule Without Being a Jerk

How do you as a leader respond to all the meeting requests? How do you protect your schedule when time and energy are finite resources?

By Erik Reed

Are you drowning in meeting requests? Do you ever dread looking at your calendar because it’s loaded with meetings and you have other things you need to do? Welcome to the world of ministry.

In addition to tasks like writing messages, planning curriculum, developing leaders, creating event calendars, and solving problems holding the ministry back, there are endless requests for meetings to discuss everything from marriage problems, questions about a sermon, desire to get more involved, sin struggles, and more. How are we expected to do it all?

I had a conversation recently with one of our staff members who told me her calendar was getting out of control. She leads our women’s ministry, runs an outreach ministry to women in the community, and assists our discipleship pastor administratively with our life group ministry.

“Stop and consider the domino effect of saying yes to every meeting. When you say “yes” to meeting requests, it creates a logjam in your other responsibilities.” — @ErikReed Share on X

She receives requests for meetings each week. New people want to connect with her over coffee or lunch. Some are seeking her out for a long-term discipleship relationship that would involve meeting weekly (requests like this come with expectations to be taught). Many want time to tell her what’s going on in their lives and to get counsel from her. As the church and her ministries grow, so do the number of these types of requests.

How do we as leaders respond to all the requests? How do we choose where to direct our time and energy when both of those things are finite resources?

The domino effect

I talked with this staff member about the importance of not letting everyone else dictate her calendar for her. It’s hard in ministry. You feel a sense of obligation to meet with everyone who requests time from you. But you also have a list of tasks and responsibilities (outside of meetings) that you must do. Many in ministry also have a sense of duty to say yes to everyone who asks for a meeting because, after all, we are paid by the generosity of our church members. It makes us feel obligated.

But stop and consider the domino effect of saying yes to every meeting. When you say “yes” to meeting requests, it creates a logjam in your other responsibilities (sermon writing, preparing for elder meetings, budget planning, managing staff, etc.). Some of those things can be pushed off to another week, but not all of them can. Nobody cares how busy your week was if you stand up on a Sunday morning with no sermon to preach.

“Nobody cares how busy your week was if you stand up on a Sunday morning with no sermon to preach.” — @ErikReed Share on X

Eventually, pushing off necessary work to take more meetings leads to one of two outcomes: You either don’t get work done or cheat your family of time and focus. Many in ministry work during the time that should be dedicated to the family. Why? To get all the ministry tasks completed. The unwillingness to say no to someone’s meeting request leads many to unwittingly say no to giving their family-focused time. It may sting to hear that, but it’s true. A yes to one thing is always a no to something else.

Strategic scheduling

What should ministry leaders do? Use a block schedule. The best practice I have found is to create blocks of time in your schedule designated to meet with people who request meetings. Don’t touch the portions of time blocked off to complete your most important tasks.

As a leader, you must block your schedule off to accomplish the most important responsibilities first. They are non-negotiable. Then you can create a few spaces in your week for meetings that are spontaneously requested.

“As a leader, you must block your schedule off to accomplish the most important responsibilities first. They are non-negotiable.” — @ErikReed Share on X

For example, if you have Tuesday from 1-3 p.m. and Thursday from 9-10:30 a.m. available to meet with people each week, then when people request time with you, those are the slots of availability you send them. If your week is already full, tell them that, and ask if they want to schedule for the next week (or the week after).

Only make changes in emergency situations. In an emergency, find out what the emergency is and determine if you are the best person to deal with the issue. Sometimes people will reach out to you, but you’re not the one they really need to talk to. They may want to ask you about finding a small group. But it would be more productive for them to meet with the person over groups. Sometimes they request to meet with you because you’re the one they recognize or know to contact.

Controlling your calendar 

If you’re not in control of your schedule, somebody else will be. But they won’t know everything else you are responsible for, nor will they care. It’s your job to manage your time wisely. Say yes to the right things. Don’t get sucked into the trap of saying yes to every meeting request. Take control of your calendar. In non-emergency situations, people can wait a few weeks before getting coffee or lunch with you. It’s not going to kill them. But it will allow you to be a more effective steward of your time.

For permission to republish this article, contact Marissa Postell Sullivan.